"BY ALL MEANS, JOIN THE SHEEP"

An open letter to any and all drivers the following may apply to. To the driver who passed me on the right and cut back over in front of me, be my guest. No reason to be aggressive with your driving. During rush hour traffic if you prefer to be one of the sheep, I really have no worries about it! Remember the old story about the tortoise and the hare? I simply choose to be the tortoise. I'd rather slowly coast along, instead of joining the sheep, piled up on each other, tapping the brake every few inches of travel. It makes more sense to me that, driving at a slower speed without frustration trumps the stress of stop and go traffic. So, no need for aggressive maneuvers. I'm sending a friendly, virtual smile and wave to you. To summarize, I promise not to feel smug thinking about the money I save on brake jobs and the stress I miss out on by driving my way during rush hour. How about you tone down the frustrated bitch routine. Deal? Great! Have a Nice day now!

"EXCUSE ME, THAT'S A CAR NOT A SALON"

So there I am sitting in stop and go traffic on the freeway. I'm alternating between daydreaming and playing a game I invented I call,"Brake Light Bingo". More on that another time. Anyways, eventually, like a beacon I become aware of a different type of light coming from inside the car ahead of me. Can't really miss it. Right above the drivers head, the rectangular shape is recognizable to all. I'm sure the mirror is put there with the best of intentions. However, in my experience, many humans don't have the sense they were born with and many times they do stupid things. Such as, applying makeup while sitting behind the wheel of a vehicle during the morning commute! Ladies don't get me wrong, if you enjoy painting your face on every day, more power to you. However, if you must put makeup on, do the rest of us a favor? Set your damn alarm 30 minutes earlier and put it on at home! Who lied and said your car was a salon? FYI it's a heavy machine that could kill you yourself or an innocent person in seconds. Someone who's minding their own business, driving to work, could actually never arrive due to your laziness and stupidity. I can't speak for anyone else, however when we're sharing the road, I feel a lot better if your hands and brain are where they should be! Who the hell are you and what gives you the right to put other drivers at risk? I can imagine some thinking, "I'm able to do both". To which I say,"bullshit, no you can't". Here's a thought, try to be a little less selfish. Put your face on safely. In the comfort of your very own bathroom! Thank you!